Prestidigitation and Brand Strength – A Hypothesis

When I was about 10 my father took me to the Magic Castle in Hollywood. What a strange and wonderful place. In every nook and cranny there was something mysterious and amazing (at least for a 10 year old). However, what stuck in my mind was not the lady cut in half, nor pianos that played themselves, but the roaming magicians who would perform small miracles up close with sleight-of-hand. If you have ever witnessed a true hand mechanic, you’ll know of what I speak. Your mind bends as your eyes defy your intellect. Hands are truly amazing instruments.

What sparked this memory was a recent trip to a good Dunkin’ Donuts. You know what I mean by a good Dunkin’. There are Dunkin’ Donuts and then there are Dunkin’ Donuts. All the food is the same across the franchise: the donuts are fresh, the coffee is hot, and the bagels toasty. The employees even smile the same amount. Until now I couldn’t put a finger on why I felt a difference between my favorite Dunkin’ and the rest. I think I know now.

The secret is in the hands.

The next time you go to a retail establishment, be it Fast Food or a Car Wash, watch the employees’ hands. They tell a story. At my favorite Dunkin’ the employees’ hands move like olympic synchronized swimmers. They exhibit fluidity, speed, deftness, and the practiced hand movements of concert pianists. At my least favorite Dunkin’, the employees seem to be wearing invisible weighted baseball mitts. To watch them mix cream and sugar makes me crazy, and don’t get me started on spreading cream cheese. It’s like watching a glacier move across the tundra. Eyes may be the window to the soul, but hands hold the light of truth. Hands don’t lie.

Our hands connect us to the world. They are our interface. Our language is filled with metaphor incorporating the word hand. “Let’s get a handle on this.” “He’s got the upper hand.” “Let’s give her a hand.” “He’s got the whole world in is hands.” For some, physical hands are the primary means of communication.

My theory is this: you can tell a great brand by how deftly the employees’ hands interact with their environment, from handling merchandize to ringing up items to filling out return forms. I think hands are a leading indicator. Slow, hesitant, close to the body, clumsy = brand in trouble. Snappy, outstretched, active, practiced = brand on the rise. The hands are in the driver’s seat. More precisely, they are on the wheel, and the moment they come off, you’re on the road to Abilene.

The Secret Calculus of Perceived Investment, Or the Gloop to Gloop Ratio.

Trapped in each of us is an emotional accountant keenly observing the people in our lives for tremblings of inequity. This mean spirited little troll evaluates each of our relationships, whether they be personal or professional, for a sense of balance and fairness.

The math is actually very simple: it’s about input to output. However, the numerator and denominator are not numerical, but rather the whole messy emotional, physical, monetary, spirtual, and cultural gloop of human existence. The balance our inner accountant seeks is that our gloop to goop ratio is equal to all those around us.

There is actually some real theory about this topic. It is called the Equity Theory of Motivation, first developed by John Stacey Adams in 1963, and it is behind the fourth dimension of Workability that I refer to as…wait for it…Investment.

Adams proposes that efforts and rewards, or inputs and outputs, are finely monitored by each of us in the workplace. Fairness is obtained when your perceived ratio of inputs to outputs is equal to others. When it is in balance we achieve Workability. When it is off, the system breaks down, resentment surfaces, motivation wanes, and we begin to suspect our coworkers of hiding automatic weapons under trench coats. We’re talkin’ ugly time. (See Dane Cook’s Creepy Guy at Work on how to handle this.)

When this universal human ratio is out of whack the reason can be as simple as time investments from different parties being off, or as gargantuan as getting stuck with a junior team when the agency sold you on a senior team. (I know you’re thinking who would ever do that.)

Keeping the balance is easier using the language of Workability. In my experience, projects fail because difficult conversations are avoided for too long. Shifting the conversation to maintaining Workability through equal and appropriate investment by all is more likely to generate positive outcomes than slow burning anger. Granted, I enjoy as much as the next guy the high of self-righteousness that comes from feeling I’m putting more in than anyone else, but when you start looking for bulky coats in your closet as a way to hide an RPG it’s time to address Workability head on.

There’s something about Abilene that makes everyone wanna pack heat.

The Seven Personalities of Bad Meetings – Or, How to Ride the Magic Bus

Magic Bus, Magic Bus, Magic Bus, Magic Bus

I want it, I want it, I want it…(You can’t have it!)

Think how much you’ll save…(You can’t have it!)]

I want it, I want it, I want it, I want it … (You can’t have it!)

– Magic Bus, The Who, 1965

The Road to Abilene, that is the path that a group decides to travel, but no individual in their right mind would choose, can be avoided through Workability.  It is a concept that I’m almost done explaining (I promise), which has an important dimension called Involvement. Simply put: Getting the right people in the room is essential to sanity and success.